jigokufever | AUGUST 2022 TEST DRIVE

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AUGUST 2022 TEST DRIVE

1. SHUTEN TERRITORY - Muscling In

art by tohdraws

In the aftermath of the curse crisis, the Shuten Clan forgave a bunch of protection payments in the region, and helped cover the costs for rebuilding. Unfortunately, some of the street gangs in the area are much less civically minded. They have used the Shuten's relaxed policies as an opportunity to turn their own screws on the local business owners. These unaffiliated youth gangs have been much rougher with the locals, and have been asking for even larger collection fees. This has pissed off the folks who are just trying to get their lives and businesses back on track!

Unfortunately, the opening of Sai no Kawara in the underground drew so much of the clan's focus and manpower, that the issues up top just slipped through the cracks. Until now! Toraguma is in a bad mood and is looking for people to take it out on: the youth gangs will do just fine.

Volunteers are being solicited to join the regular Shuten enforcers in driving these interlopers out of Shuten territory. The gangs are wise to the usual Shuten tactics, though, and they're prepared for a fight. They are also appealing to the influx of Lost Souls: they act as though they're the victims of the factions' power struggles! They propose that taking up arms against the Shuten Clan will win them favor with the other groups in the city. (It will look less good with the Shuten Clan, should you be assigned to them.)

Fight with the Shutens, or with the gangs. Either way, a fight is coming.

2. TAMAMO TERRITORY - Throat Goat (NSFW)

at by akai riot

This prompt is overtly sexual in nature. Please use the proper NSFW labelling in your top levels and threads.

While the Palace of Sai in the underground is doing well, that doesn't mean the other businesses in the Tamamo Clan's collection have been slacking. One of the least "classy" soaplands has decided they're going to hold a contest to drive up business for themselves! They are partnering with some of the other sex clubs in the area for the sleaziest of events.

The Hyottoko Cup is looking for volunteer participants! The competition is pretty straightforward: a ruler is drawn on the throat of each participant and an array of members is presented to swallow. Whichever contestant can take the guests deepest and longest will take home the "coveted" Hyottoko Cup! Ok, there's a little judge favoritism involved too, so put on a show.

The guests have likewise been pulled in as volunteers, with instructions that they don't have to make this easy on the participants. Guests are provided with special seals that they can use for the length of the competition to enhance their natural assets. For those lacking the equipment entirely, there's a seal for that too.

Have fun and play nice.

3. TAMAMO TERRITORY - Strike a Poise (GEN)

Other businesses looking to jump start this month's earnings are also getting in on the spirit of competition! Businesses less oriented towards sexual service have come together as a means to draw in the high dollar clients, and one local club has proposed something old school.

Sign up for the Poise Contest, where contestants are placed into more and more ridiculous geta while tasked with serving drinks to the guest. Spills are expected, and the guests are cheerfully kitted out with cheap club-branded ponchos to protect their clothes. (Marketing, am I right?) While spills are expected, the contestant will lose points for each of the spilled drinks. Try to keep your balance as you attend to increasingly absurd drink orders. The intensity of the traditional footwear will only make your job that much harder.

Do you have what it takes to pour a champagne fountain while wearing teetering tengu geta? Prove your balance and dexterity is the best and the take home prize is some sweet cash. For Lost Souls freshly in the city, the chance to win some extra money can't really be passed up, huh…

4. SUTOKU TERRITORY - Jigokucho's Got Talent

Ever since Moonday's beloved singer – Ringo-chan – was kidnapped at the Tanabata festival, the band has had to cancel all of their scheduled gigs. Unfortunately, they were a hugely popular act, booked solid in most of the Sutoku Alliance's various nightclubs. This has left a ton of empty spots that need to be filled quickly, before the crowds get upset and demand… refunds.

That's where you come in, Lost Souls! Desperate promoters and talent bookers are literally grabbing Lost Souls off the street and begging, pleading, with them to perform a set for the night. They just need to have something to fill the space Moonday would have otherwise occupied. At least give the crowd something to see!

Acts do not need to be of the musical variety. Any performing talent is accepted, no matter how esoteric or bizarre! If it can fill out a 15-30 minute set, the club owners will be happy and the customers will at least see something interesting; even if it's a bad kind of interesting. So get on stage and show this city what you've got!

( Help us fill our time slots, please! We're desperate! 😩)

5. DEPARTMENT OF THE ENMA - Sticky Paws II: Outta the Bag

The Enma Department is busy: they have a kidnapping to investigate, a primordial god to pin down, and the crisis of their ever-shifting public image to manage. However, crime never sleeps and is always there to add to the troubled Department's workload. Worse still, we thought this little crime spree was over six months ago! But here it is again, much to the Enma's chagrin.

Cat cafés are a popular tourist attraction all across Jigokucho. About six months ago, a gang of bakeneko infiltrated several of the cafés to rob customers occupied with kitty bliss. Wallets, jewelry, and anything else those sticky paws could snatch away were being picked in droves. The cat capers are afoot once more!

Are you a hapless victim of these furry thieves, or are you helping the Department of the Enma track down these cat burglars? Unfortunately, the bakeneko are exceptionally clever and are using a seal to disguise their secondary tails. This makes them look just about like any normal cat. Better make sure your lead is good, or you'll be chasing down an ordinary Felis Catus. Soft to pet, but not going to return your pilfered cash.

Of course, the café staff might be in on this caper too… It's never easy to tell who's getting a cut of the profits. Be careful who you trust out there.

6. ALL OVER - The 100 Billion Yen Man (PLOT RELEVANT)

The local TV news has been announcing that Kaberou Kannazaki – the legendary finance wolf and the father of kidnapping victim, Ringo-chan – will be making an announcement this week. People have flocked to television sets throughout the city; at the squares, around TVs in bars, electronic stores, each other's phones, and any other venue with a connection. The kidnapping has been a highly public ordeal and the talk of the town. Many of the locals were present at the festival and witnessed the crime. They want to hear what the word is!

The public doesn't have to wait long. Wolf-eared Kaberou sits at a press desk, surrounded by microphones, and dazzled with flashbulbs. He clears his throat and, as he begins to speak, he is direct and to the point; not unlike a wolf lunging for the throat.

"As of today, I am issuing a bounty on the man known as the Iron Bear, who has claimed responsibility for the kidnapping of my daughter, Ringo Kannazaki. The payout to the party responsible for bringing me Iron Bear, dead or alive, is 100 Billion Yen. Individuals or groups, I don't care. Just bring my daughter back to me, and the money is yours."

Well! The Department of the Enma's hopes of an orderly investigation have been dashed, but this is certainly an opportunity for anyone brave enough – or, more accurately, stupid enough – to traverse the Wasteland. Maybe one of you out there will find the legendary Iron Bear and bring him to some form of justice.

Local businesses are quick to leap at this opportunity, too. They begin to aggressively push sponsorships at would-be bounty hunters. Weapons? Armor? Survival gear? All at discount prices! Each faction has their interest in collecting the massive bounty as well. They will all be putting a lot of pressure on recruits to get ready to head out to the Wastes.

If you just got here? Well, it would definitely be in your interest to start finding gear, and finding people willing to collect that bounty with you. It could mean a big step forward toward your eventual contract, after all.

Welcome to the test drive meme!

First of all, big thanks to our discord chat for the "Throat Goat" prompt idea. Stay golden, gang.
IF YOU'RE TOP-LEVELING A NEW CHARACTER, post it here!
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Threads here can be considered game canon.
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Reserves are open until September 5th.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

MUSCLING IN.

( there is some part of him, he thinks, that wouldn’t mind taking the side of stubborn kids and their desires if it weren’t for the fact that it does, in the end, seem to affect the supposed innocents of the city, whoever they are. people trying to run their businesses to the best of their ability, being pushed down by the weight of larger collection fees and promised violence; and here he is, supposed to be some man of the people, right? it’s sort of hard to contend with that when he’s in hell, but whatever.

tempted as he is to be contrary, in the end, he’s itching for a fight, and in the end, he gets one: it’s a group of maybe six gang members on one, but he’s had worse odds. these kids fight with pipes and broken glass and have no idea who they’re dealing with, but in the same vein, his own powers feel muted here, like they’re being filtered through a strainer; he’s dodging their attacks with relative ease, smiling from behind the gleam of black sunglasses—the blindfold is a little hard to see through with this level of power tampering, so it’s in his pocket. )

E~h, you were saying? ( one of the grunts comes at him, swings at his head—he jerks to the side, a small side-step to move out of the way. ) You’re the victim, here? How terrible~

( this game of argument, cat and mouse, will continue just long enough for satoru to scope out someone approaching—to which, of course, he immediately lifts a hand up in a wave; one of the gang members ends up tripping underneath it, the result of a misaimed attack. )

Oi, over here. I think I need a second opinion!

THROAT GOAT. (NSFW)

( well, this isn’t exactly what he thought he signed up for, but it does teach him a bit about this weird hell city.

normally he would be happy to compete in some sort of contest that would be only further proof of his greatness above others—perceived or otherwise—but this deep-throating challenge, or whatever they’ve described it to be in prettier words, is something he’d rather witness than actively pursue, despite experience. he doesn’t like the idea of someone drawing on his neck: that’s just classless, right? instead, bemused, he accepts the invitation to be a volunteer for the guests; he imagines that he’s been dragged into this nasty spot due to his height, as though hoping he might provide some kind of challenge.

well, challenge or not, he’s taken a seat as instructed, legs crossed idly one over the other. there’s some sort of seal that’s been given to him, something he turned his nose up at immediately—the last thing he needs is more seals, and even the thought of the word annoys him. it’s only once he realizes that he’s being presented with a contestant that his brows lift, shown above the line of his sunglasses. )

Well, hello there. ( his voice is warm, almost amused, as he slings an arm back over the back of his seat; the other arm drapes across his own lap, relaxed and calm. ) I know they said we could make this as difficult as we want, but I want to know what you want, first. I’m a nice guy.

( sure, satoru. )

STRIKE A POISE.

( now, this contest? a chance to earn some money and show off? he’s definitely here for it.

practice with his own technique has made him almost too focused on poise and position; but without the full aid of the six eyes or infinity, without the added bonus of cursed energy manipulation, or anything else, it’s not like he can walk on water the way he used to, and not like he can simply hold his weight up in the air, cheating as it might be. he has to do this old school—meaning that he’s going to have to actually focus on keeping his balance. the geta are hard to walk in, though he does have the advantage of at least knowing what they are and how to use them well.

the first spill is all it takes to correct both his balance and his posture: after that, he’s moving around with great finesse, dressed down in a light-blue star patterned yukata instead of his usual fare, the dark blue obi cinched tight around his waist. if the collar dips a little too far, showing off the pale skin of his chest and distracting any guests, well: that’s not his problem, as far as he’s concerned. the only thing that matters is the impending champagne fountain that he’s decided to go for, making a wonderful show out of it as he stands up tall, the bottle tipped in one elegant hand to pour the bubbling, sweet liquid down over the tower of glasses.

perfect. wonderful. everyone must be admiring him as usual. is anyone not interested? pointedly, he sets the empty champagne bottle down, turning just slightly so that he can pluck a glass of champagne off the top; he doesn’t really drink himself, so he’s holding the glass out to anyone that wants it or some company. )

STICKY PAWS II.

( the most interesting thing about this place might be that, as expected, all the legends and stories are true, just like back home—and that there are apparently plenty of bakeneko to go around, in this place, and he’s happy to be tasked with tracking them down.

he had figured that the longer he stayed, the more he would find his powers returning to him, but this hasn’t been the case. instead, they’ve remained nearly at the same level they had when coming in: something alarming, but something he can’t really figure out how to fix. this leaves him tracking down the pesky thieves in an old school sort of way—long legs and quick responses mean he’s chasing a cat down some back alley when he finally, at the end of it, manages to catch the thing by the back of its neck.

it looks thin, howls at him impatiently, and he holds it by the scruff of its neck, watching its legs curl in, its tail swishing in anger. with a laugh, he plants his other hand on his hip—look, he’s not being cruel, but he has to check no matter what, right? if it’s just a cat, he’ll buy it some of hell’s finest tuna or something.

and, once again, he’s enlisting the help of other people in this hell city. )

Excuse me~ ( sorry to the first person he sees on the street, possibly also pursuing cats, or maybe just making their way to wherever they need to go. he’s still got the cat in one hand, and he lifts the other to point at it. ) Could you pat this criminal down for me? Maybe something will fall out of its pockets.

( what pockets….. )

THE 100 BILLION YEN MAN: NETWORK.

< UN: justdesserts >

anyone need a buddy for this bounty thing? i’m new and this not having money thing sucks~
promise i’ll make it worth your while!

[Matoba, who was absolutely an Innocent Bystander and is in no way just here to capitalize on all this cat-chasing, turns towards the sound of an unfamiliar voice calling out to him, and glances first at Gojo.]

[(There's a brief-- flash, as he looks at where the man's eyes should be. Something blue. Matoba focuses his own, one uncovered eye a moment longer, but doesn't dwell on it. Not when more important things are at hand.)]

Oya.... what do we have here? A nasty little thief, no doubt, hm? [Despite his brimming smile, there was a quality to it like none of the emotions showing on his face were real. Half of it was covered anyway, by a paper spelltag that shrouded his right eye. He coos as he bends over to get at face-level with the very unamused cat.]

Yes, you're a very nasty boy. A fluffy, bad boy. Shall we pat you down? [Matoba reaches out to start giving this cat rubs at the top of his head, then the sides of his cheeks, all while he thrashes and yowls.]

Edited 2022-08-27 00:15 (UTC)

( well, what do we have here? a short guy with a shrine tag plastered to his face? sounds suspicious.

over the rim of his sunglasses, there's a brief glance at the face of the person that's come to his aid--or whatever he's come for--but he doesn't spare it too much thought. anywhere else, he might be able to pick up a better feeling for the abilities of someone else, but here, his senses still feel like a wet towel has been plastered all over them; besides, the guy goes for the cat immediately, and all satoru has to do is hold it by its scruff to keep it from escaping.

there's a brief yowl of complaint at all the touching, but even so, the cat doesn't really do anything.

guess he's really gotten this all wrong. with a bright laugh, he sweeps his other arm underneath the bottom of the cat to cradle it, slightly, instead of holding it like he might drop it right down. )

Looks like this nasty thief of ours is only after your heart. ( there's a warmth to his voice, but much like the stranger's features, little of it seems to display anything at all. ) Don't tell me it's already spoken for. She'll be heartbroken, and then I'll have to take her out for drinks, and everything will be a mess...

[Sussy as hell... But despite his appearances, he seems to be having the time of his life harassing this poor cat under duress of capture, at least until Gojo sweeps it back up into his arms. Is that a pout Gojo saw, just for a moment there? Surely not.]

Ah, I could only wish. [Matoba folds his hands back into the sleeves of his kimono. (He is not answering the question about being taken or not.)] Although I wouldn't mind feeding it a little while. Taking it to dinner, hm...

[Y-you meant taking the cat out to dinner, right. Right.]

But, while I'm here, there's no shame in having a little fun as well. [His smile, which has relaxed into something more calm and collected, curls into a smirk.] I had heard that there was a lot of trouble being caused by the cats around here lately, so I thought I might as well pitch in and help... It seems that what you have there is nothing more than a hungry stray.

Shall we find the true culprits?

A little fun, huh? ( there's a faint curl of his lips into a smile, but it's short-lived; time for this guy to put his money where his mouth is. ) Sure, but...

( he hoists the cat up a little, as though intent on putting it over his shoulder--but it digs its claws in, baring its teeth in a gnarly growl, and uses his shoulder to springboard up and out of his arms. as it jumps past his back, it immediately makes a beeline for the alley; satoru turns to watch it before he sighs, shaking his head in feigned forlorn disappointment. )

Ah, well. I was going to say you had to take us to dinner first, but it looks like we'll only be dining for two.

( a glint of a smile, again, but he pushes his hands back into his pockets, relaxed. )

Or did you want to do the honorable thing first and find the terrible no-good cat thieves? I can wait.

gojo satoru / jujutsu kaisen

STICKY PAWS II.

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Muscling in

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muscling in

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1/2

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billion man un: fushiguro

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throat goat i'm so sorry

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strike a poise

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