jigokufever | AUGUST 2022 TEST DRIVE

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AUGUST 2022 TEST DRIVE

1. SHUTEN TERRITORY - Muscling In

art by tohdraws

In the aftermath of the curse crisis, the Shuten Clan forgave a bunch of protection payments in the region, and helped cover the costs for rebuilding. Unfortunately, some of the street gangs in the area are much less civically minded. They have used the Shuten's relaxed policies as an opportunity to turn their own screws on the local business owners. These unaffiliated youth gangs have been much rougher with the locals, and have been asking for even larger collection fees. This has pissed off the folks who are just trying to get their lives and businesses back on track!

Unfortunately, the opening of Sai no Kawara in the underground drew so much of the clan's focus and manpower, that the issues up top just slipped through the cracks. Until now! Toraguma is in a bad mood and is looking for people to take it out on: the youth gangs will do just fine.

Volunteers are being solicited to join the regular Shuten enforcers in driving these interlopers out of Shuten territory. The gangs are wise to the usual Shuten tactics, though, and they're prepared for a fight. They are also appealing to the influx of Lost Souls: they act as though they're the victims of the factions' power struggles! They propose that taking up arms against the Shuten Clan will win them favor with the other groups in the city. (It will look less good with the Shuten Clan, should you be assigned to them.)

Fight with the Shutens, or with the gangs. Either way, a fight is coming.

2. TAMAMO TERRITORY - Throat Goat (NSFW)

at by akai riot

This prompt is overtly sexual in nature. Please use the proper NSFW labelling in your top levels and threads.

While the Palace of Sai in the underground is doing well, that doesn't mean the other businesses in the Tamamo Clan's collection have been slacking. One of the least "classy" soaplands has decided they're going to hold a contest to drive up business for themselves! They are partnering with some of the other sex clubs in the area for the sleaziest of events.

The Hyottoko Cup is looking for volunteer participants! The competition is pretty straightforward: a ruler is drawn on the throat of each participant and an array of members is presented to swallow. Whichever contestant can take the guests deepest and longest will take home the "coveted" Hyottoko Cup! Ok, there's a little judge favoritism involved too, so put on a show.

The guests have likewise been pulled in as volunteers, with instructions that they don't have to make this easy on the participants. Guests are provided with special seals that they can use for the length of the competition to enhance their natural assets. For those lacking the equipment entirely, there's a seal for that too.

Have fun and play nice.

3. TAMAMO TERRITORY - Strike a Poise (GEN)

Other businesses looking to jump start this month's earnings are also getting in on the spirit of competition! Businesses less oriented towards sexual service have come together as a means to draw in the high dollar clients, and one local club has proposed something old school.

Sign up for the Poise Contest, where contestants are placed into more and more ridiculous geta while tasked with serving drinks to the guest. Spills are expected, and the guests are cheerfully kitted out with cheap club-branded ponchos to protect their clothes. (Marketing, am I right?) While spills are expected, the contestant will lose points for each of the spilled drinks. Try to keep your balance as you attend to increasingly absurd drink orders. The intensity of the traditional footwear will only make your job that much harder.

Do you have what it takes to pour a champagne fountain while wearing teetering tengu geta? Prove your balance and dexterity is the best and the take home prize is some sweet cash. For Lost Souls freshly in the city, the chance to win some extra money can't really be passed up, huh…

4. SUTOKU TERRITORY - Jigokucho's Got Talent

Ever since Moonday's beloved singer – Ringo-chan – was kidnapped at the Tanabata festival, the band has had to cancel all of their scheduled gigs. Unfortunately, they were a hugely popular act, booked solid in most of the Sutoku Alliance's various nightclubs. This has left a ton of empty spots that need to be filled quickly, before the crowds get upset and demand… refunds.

That's where you come in, Lost Souls! Desperate promoters and talent bookers are literally grabbing Lost Souls off the street and begging, pleading, with them to perform a set for the night. They just need to have something to fill the space Moonday would have otherwise occupied. At least give the crowd something to see!

Acts do not need to be of the musical variety. Any performing talent is accepted, no matter how esoteric or bizarre! If it can fill out a 15-30 minute set, the club owners will be happy and the customers will at least see something interesting; even if it's a bad kind of interesting. So get on stage and show this city what you've got!

( Help us fill our time slots, please! We're desperate! 😩)

5. DEPARTMENT OF THE ENMA - Sticky Paws II: Outta the Bag

The Enma Department is busy: they have a kidnapping to investigate, a primordial god to pin down, and the crisis of their ever-shifting public image to manage. However, crime never sleeps and is always there to add to the troubled Department's workload. Worse still, we thought this little crime spree was over six months ago! But here it is again, much to the Enma's chagrin.

Cat cafés are a popular tourist attraction all across Jigokucho. About six months ago, a gang of bakeneko infiltrated several of the cafés to rob customers occupied with kitty bliss. Wallets, jewelry, and anything else those sticky paws could snatch away were being picked in droves. The cat capers are afoot once more!

Are you a hapless victim of these furry thieves, or are you helping the Department of the Enma track down these cat burglars? Unfortunately, the bakeneko are exceptionally clever and are using a seal to disguise their secondary tails. This makes them look just about like any normal cat. Better make sure your lead is good, or you'll be chasing down an ordinary Felis Catus. Soft to pet, but not going to return your pilfered cash.

Of course, the café staff might be in on this caper too… It's never easy to tell who's getting a cut of the profits. Be careful who you trust out there.

6. ALL OVER - The 100 Billion Yen Man (PLOT RELEVANT)

The local TV news has been announcing that Kaberou Kannazaki – the legendary finance wolf and the father of kidnapping victim, Ringo-chan – will be making an announcement this week. People have flocked to television sets throughout the city; at the squares, around TVs in bars, electronic stores, each other's phones, and any other venue with a connection. The kidnapping has been a highly public ordeal and the talk of the town. Many of the locals were present at the festival and witnessed the crime. They want to hear what the word is!

The public doesn't have to wait long. Wolf-eared Kaberou sits at a press desk, surrounded by microphones, and dazzled with flashbulbs. He clears his throat and, as he begins to speak, he is direct and to the point; not unlike a wolf lunging for the throat.

"As of today, I am issuing a bounty on the man known as the Iron Bear, who has claimed responsibility for the kidnapping of my daughter, Ringo Kannazaki. The payout to the party responsible for bringing me Iron Bear, dead or alive, is 100 Billion Yen. Individuals or groups, I don't care. Just bring my daughter back to me, and the money is yours."

Well! The Department of the Enma's hopes of an orderly investigation have been dashed, but this is certainly an opportunity for anyone brave enough – or, more accurately, stupid enough – to traverse the Wasteland. Maybe one of you out there will find the legendary Iron Bear and bring him to some form of justice.

Local businesses are quick to leap at this opportunity, too. They begin to aggressively push sponsorships at would-be bounty hunters. Weapons? Armor? Survival gear? All at discount prices! Each faction has their interest in collecting the massive bounty as well. They will all be putting a lot of pressure on recruits to get ready to head out to the Wastes.

If you just got here? Well, it would definitely be in your interest to start finding gear, and finding people willing to collect that bounty with you. It could mean a big step forward toward your eventual contract, after all.

Welcome to the test drive meme!

First of all, big thanks to our discord chat for the "Throat Goat" prompt idea. Stay golden, gang.
IF YOU'RE TOP-LEVELING A NEW CHARACTER, post it here!
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Threads here can be considered game canon.
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Reserves are open until September 5th.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Lead the way. [And spare him any door color-related troubles, please and thank you.]

Both, as a matter of fact. [In as much as Godot can say he was "born" rather than "created." But nobody in their right mind likes traveling through Los Angeles.] Once you handle that traffic, the streetmaps in Hades ought to be a piece of cake in comparison.

[Since he intends to buy her a cup of coffee, it would seem introductions are in order.] I go by Godot. Pleasure's all mine, Ms...?

[She smiles impulsively, even with a mental footnote for go by; what a name to run into. She offers her hand to shake.]

Wexler. Kim Wexler.

[She walks. L.A. does sound rightly comparable to hell.]

I've never been, but I'd like to take a road trip someday if work ever settles down. I live in Albuquerque.

Ms. Wexler. [He shakes her hand with a slight nod of his head, as though committing it to memory. Then resumes following her down the street.]

I suppose it's a foolish question to ask what brings you to these parts. You're likely in the same boat as I am.

[A grin.] Unless you're a particularly well-disguised demon. [Or "yokai," he supposes.]

[She almost laughs -– her, a demon?]

All human, fortunately. [It had never occurred to her to want to be anything else. What brought her here is another matter; she sincerely hopes he's not in the same miserable circumstances as her. She's happy to slide away from that topic:] Can I ask about the visor?

[She gestures at her own face. It looks like something Geordi would wear.]

Of course. I understand the curiosity. But the real question is whether I'll answer.

[He seems to think about it a moment first.]

In my experience we all wear masks, whether on our faces or over our hearts.

[At least she was semi-warned that he's incredibly full of it...]

[Full of it, sure, but it's almost touching to hear something like that out loud, not for any particular wisdom but just because it seems so candid. So self-assured.]

Most people don't want others to know they have masks at all, though.

Which makes it all something of a farce, doesn't it? We all pretend we're not wearing them, and eventually fail to see one another's as well.

[Very r/im14andthisisdeep and all, but does not change the fact his mask is both quite visible and quite literal.

Perhaps her willingness to humor the pop philosophy gets her a slightly more straightforward answer.]

Let's just say mine gives me a better view of the world than would otherwise be possible. [Geordi was a guess right on the money, actually.]

[Technology to the rescue. Kim nods.]

There's some colourful people here. It's hard to tell who is just dressing up for show.

[She feels remarkably plain in her tailored pantsuit separates in neutral colours, but then again, she's never wanted to draw attention to herself.]

No kidding. [And he's used to people dressing up for show. Even if he's, surprisingly, not one of them] Can't say I see a lot of fish-people and ogres in my everyday.

And coming from a prosecuting attorney, that's really saying something.

You're a prosecutor. [She slows a step, looking at him.] Some of you really see people as monsters, though. [She says it lightly, like the professional humour it is, but she adds as explanation:] I play defense.

I am. And believe me, some of the colleagues I've known are more frightening than any monster.

[Fortunately the absolute worst of them was already dealt with years ago, before he took up the mantle. Otherwise he'd likely have flattened the bastard's face and gotten fired by now.

He takes the joke in stride, at least. Even sounds quite sincere as he speaks well of his "rival" position.] Defense is a noble career. Overly maligned and underappreciated.

Though I'm sure plenty would say all lawyers deserve a stint in weird Japan-Hell.

They'd probably be right.

[There's a note of finality there. If it isn't true of all of them, then she'll say it of herself.]

We are, but you guys get your own bad reputation. What drew you to prosecution?

The twisted threads of fate tangled me in their choking grasp. The path of the prosecutor was the only way to escape them-- the only way to follow my bitter destiny.

[What an incredibly normal thing to say in a completely normal, conversational tone of voice.]

And what drew you to defense?

[It's like seeing someone jump off the screen of some old Hollywood drama, one where you're too swept up by the melodrama of it to notice most people don't talk like that. It's rare that people have the moxie. She can't resist a smile.]

Atticus Finch, at first. And when I graduated and worked and found myself doing banking law, serving clients who only thought about money, I just...

[She shrugs.]

Atticus set me straight.

[The ghost of a dead man deep inside him stirs at that answer. He would have said something similar-- the name of an inspirational man who brought hope to so many in their darkest times.

In spite of everything, Godot can't help a smile, somewhat more genuine than usual (though it's likely difficult to tell, what with his lack of visible eyes.)]

A good answer.

[At last, they arrive in the block Kim spoke of before. He spots the sign with the flower on it and takes in the building around it, memorizing where they are and what the cafe itself looks like as he gets the door for her.]

After you. What are you drinking?

[Kim often reminds herself she doesn’t need anyone’s approval for her choices. Right now, she feels like she wants it anyway. It’s a balm on a thought that digs into her as soon as she sees that smile: Atticus would condemn me. Anyone would.

She turns her attention to the barista, unruffled, in polite but slow Japanese:]

Large coffee, black.

[Kim Wexler has minimal concept of different roasts; she just drinks what’s available, even if it’s from a vending machine.]

[The Japanese thing is pretty interesting. He's never spoken a word of it in his life, but he finds he can understand Kim's coffee orders and the remarks of the barista just fine. And he's fairly certain he's not speaking it himself when he orders, but they all seem to understand him in return.]

Make it six, if you please.

[Well, there's a moment there where the barista misunderstands, but Godot is quick to clarify.]

No. I did say "six." To go is fine. Thanks.

[Godot hands over a chunk of the meager cash he does have to his name, then waits at the end of the counter for the order (as the barista tries to find a small box or something to put them in.)]

[Her amusement is transparent.]

Do you microwave it later, or are you planning to not sleep for days?

[No judgment.]

I've gotten a slow start today, actually. The unexpected layover in Hell threw off my normal routine.

[The barista hands across the first cup, which Godot politely passes to Kim. Then he takes the second in hand, takes a deep inhale of the aroma, then puts it to his lips and absolutely slams it, draining nearly half the cup without flinching at either the taste or the temperature.]

Ha...! Not bad. Who knew they could make a decent brew in a place like this?

[Alarming as that looks, Kim decides he's her favourite kind of colleague. Nobody who isn't a workaholic does that kind of shit. She smiles over the rim of her cup as she takes a modest sip.]

To think my husband says midnight espressos are a little much.

[They are.]

[Now, here is a woman who understands the beauty of pure black magic.]

Your husband's nuts. What better time to drink an espresso than the darkest depths of the night?

[He's a little more measured with the rest of the cup, normal-sized sips. It all looks just a wee bit unhinged when the barista passes over a cardboard box with four additional large black coffees crammed inside, with Godot accepts and tucks under his arm.]

I think I'll find a table. [He's gonna be here a while. Maybe not as long as you'd hope four and a half coffees would take, but a while.] You're welcome to join me if you like, Ms. Wexler.

It gets me through whatever I need to get done. He'd just like to see me finish work with enough time to get dinner and see a movie.

[She says this without any particular defensiveness –– there's even appreciation there, subtle as it is. Newlyweds, and all.]

Sure, I'll stay for a bit.

[It's not like she has friends to meet up with; it's job-hunting with the factions or sightseeing alone. Kim is, regretfully, not someone who makes friends easy.]

Have you given any thought to this faction business?

[He snags a table in the corner, even pulls out a chair for Kim in true gentlemanly fashion. Then he sits nearest the wall and sets down his box of coffee cups on his side of the table.]

Sounds like a racket, if you ask me. Pull a bunch of vulnerable, "lost" people into your city, put a jersey on them and sic them on your enemies if they want to eat. Throw in an incentive to keep them from complaining, and voila. Instant army.

Problem is, I can't see much in the way of alternate options.

[She's surprised by the gesture, but she accepts it just the same, sitting down and folding one leg over the other.]

And it's one army or another. I'm not sure which part makes me more apprehensive –– the people who buy into it wholeheartedly, or the people who will fight against a system they agreed to join.

[Or where she'll fall.]

The whole thing stinks like last week's leftovers.

[He finishes up the remnants of that first cup of coffee and sets it aside, immediately reaching for another.]

As always, I suspect, it's a matter of walking a fine line, no matter how twisted and wayward the trail.

AUGUST 2022 TEST DRIVE

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