jigokufever | AUGUST 2022 TEST DRIVE

1. SHUTEN TERRITORY - Muscling In

art by tohdraws

In the aftermath of the curse crisis, the Shuten Clan forgave a bunch of protection payments in the region, and helped cover the costs for rebuilding. Unfortunately, some of the street gangs in the area are much less civically minded. They have used the Shuten's relaxed policies as an opportunity to turn their own screws on the local business owners. These unaffiliated youth gangs have been much rougher with the locals, and have been asking for even larger collection fees. This has pissed off the folks who are just trying to get their lives and businesses back on track!

Unfortunately, the opening of Sai no Kawara in the underground drew so much of the clan's focus and manpower, that the issues up top just slipped through the cracks. Until now! Toraguma is in a bad mood and is looking for people to take it out on: the youth gangs will do just fine.

Volunteers are being solicited to join the regular Shuten enforcers in driving these interlopers out of Shuten territory. The gangs are wise to the usual Shuten tactics, though, and they're prepared for a fight. They are also appealing to the influx of Lost Souls: they act as though they're the victims of the factions' power struggles! They propose that taking up arms against the Shuten Clan will win them favor with the other groups in the city. (It will look less good with the Shuten Clan, should you be assigned to them.)

Fight with the Shutens, or with the gangs. Either way, a fight is coming.

2. TAMAMO TERRITORY - Throat Goat (NSFW)

at by akai riot

This prompt is overtly sexual in nature. Please use the proper NSFW labelling in your top levels and threads.

While the Palace of Sai in the underground is doing well, that doesn't mean the other businesses in the Tamamo Clan's collection have been slacking. One of the least "classy" soaplands has decided they're going to hold a contest to drive up business for themselves! They are partnering with some of the other sex clubs in the area for the sleaziest of events.

The Hyottoko Cup is looking for volunteer participants! The competition is pretty straightforward: a ruler is drawn on the throat of each participant and an array of members is presented to swallow. Whichever contestant can take the guests deepest and longest will take home the "coveted" Hyottoko Cup! Ok, there's a little judge favoritism involved too, so put on a show.

The guests have likewise been pulled in as volunteers, with instructions that they don't have to make this easy on the participants. Guests are provided with special seals that they can use for the length of the competition to enhance their natural assets. For those lacking the equipment entirely, there's a seal for that too.

Have fun and play nice.

3. TAMAMO TERRITORY - Strike a Poise (GEN)

Other businesses looking to jump start this month's earnings are also getting in on the spirit of competition! Businesses less oriented towards sexual service have come together as a means to draw in the high dollar clients, and one local club has proposed something old school.

Sign up for the Poise Contest, where contestants are placed into more and more ridiculous geta while tasked with serving drinks to the guest. Spills are expected, and the guests are cheerfully kitted out with cheap club-branded ponchos to protect their clothes. (Marketing, am I right?) While spills are expected, the contestant will lose points for each of the spilled drinks. Try to keep your balance as you attend to increasingly absurd drink orders. The intensity of the traditional footwear will only make your job that much harder.

Do you have what it takes to pour a champagne fountain while wearing teetering tengu geta? Prove your balance and dexterity is the best and the take home prize is some sweet cash. For Lost Souls freshly in the city, the chance to win some extra money can't really be passed up, huh…

4. SUTOKU TERRITORY - Jigokucho's Got Talent

Ever since Moonday's beloved singer – Ringo-chan – was kidnapped at the Tanabata festival, the band has had to cancel all of their scheduled gigs. Unfortunately, they were a hugely popular act, booked solid in most of the Sutoku Alliance's various nightclubs. This has left a ton of empty spots that need to be filled quickly, before the crowds get upset and demand… refunds.

That's where you come in, Lost Souls! Desperate promoters and talent bookers are literally grabbing Lost Souls off the street and begging, pleading, with them to perform a set for the night. They just need to have something to fill the space Moonday would have otherwise occupied. At least give the crowd something to see!

Acts do not need to be of the musical variety. Any performing talent is accepted, no matter how esoteric or bizarre! If it can fill out a 15-30 minute set, the club owners will be happy and the customers will at least see something interesting; even if it's a bad kind of interesting. So get on stage and show this city what you've got!

( Help us fill our time slots, please! We're desperate! 😩)

5. DEPARTMENT OF THE ENMA - Sticky Paws II: Outta the Bag

The Enma Department is busy: they have a kidnapping to investigate, a primordial god to pin down, and the crisis of their ever-shifting public image to manage. However, crime never sleeps and is always there to add to the troubled Department's workload. Worse still, we thought this little crime spree was over six months ago! But here it is again, much to the Enma's chagrin.

Cat cafés are a popular tourist attraction all across Jigokucho. About six months ago, a gang of bakeneko infiltrated several of the cafés to rob customers occupied with kitty bliss. Wallets, jewelry, and anything else those sticky paws could snatch away were being picked in droves. The cat capers are afoot once more!

Are you a hapless victim of these furry thieves, or are you helping the Department of the Enma track down these cat burglars? Unfortunately, the bakeneko are exceptionally clever and are using a seal to disguise their secondary tails. This makes them look just about like any normal cat. Better make sure your lead is good, or you'll be chasing down an ordinary Felis Catus. Soft to pet, but not going to return your pilfered cash.

Of course, the café staff might be in on this caper too… It's never easy to tell who's getting a cut of the profits. Be careful who you trust out there.

6. ALL OVER - The 100 Billion Yen Man (PLOT RELEVANT)

The local TV news has been announcing that Kaberou Kannazaki – the legendary finance wolf and the father of kidnapping victim, Ringo-chan – will be making an announcement this week. People have flocked to television sets throughout the city; at the squares, around TVs in bars, electronic stores, each other's phones, and any other venue with a connection. The kidnapping has been a highly public ordeal and the talk of the town. Many of the locals were present at the festival and witnessed the crime. They want to hear what the word is!

The public doesn't have to wait long. Wolf-eared Kaberou sits at a press desk, surrounded by microphones, and dazzled with flashbulbs. He clears his throat and, as he begins to speak, he is direct and to the point; not unlike a wolf lunging for the throat.

"As of today, I am issuing a bounty on the man known as the Iron Bear, who has claimed responsibility for the kidnapping of my daughter, Ringo Kannazaki. The payout to the party responsible for bringing me Iron Bear, dead or alive, is 100 Billion Yen. Individuals or groups, I don't care. Just bring my daughter back to me, and the money is yours."

Well! The Department of the Enma's hopes of an orderly investigation have been dashed, but this is certainly an opportunity for anyone brave enough – or, more accurately, stupid enough – to traverse the Wasteland. Maybe one of you out there will find the legendary Iron Bear and bring him to some form of justice.

Local businesses are quick to leap at this opportunity, too. They begin to aggressively push sponsorships at would-be bounty hunters. Weapons? Armor? Survival gear? All at discount prices! Each faction has their interest in collecting the massive bounty as well. They will all be putting a lot of pressure on recruits to get ready to head out to the Wastes.

If you just got here? Well, it would definitely be in your interest to start finding gear, and finding people willing to collect that bounty with you. It could mean a big step forward toward your eventual contract, after all.

Welcome to the test drive meme!

First of all, big thanks to our discord chat for the "Throat Goat" prompt idea. Stay golden, gang.
IF YOU'RE TOP-LEVELING A NEW CHARACTER, post it here!
Characters already in the game can top level as well.
Threads here can be considered game canon.
Characters can be recruited to do work for any faction until they're given their official assignment.
If you have any questions about the TDM content, please ask them here! You can find information on the story so far here!
If you have questions about the game itself, please check out the premise, FAQ, and rules pages.
Reserves are open until September 5th.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

What's it matter?? The fact that you're harboring a thief! That's what matters!

I've heard about what's been going on around here, but I just didn't believe it! That's not an ordinary cat!

[Darin jabs an accusing finger Leo's way.]

So, either you're aiding and abetting a thief...or you've got an ulterior motive to snapping up that cat! So, what's it gonna be? You gonna make me work for this? Or can we do this like adults?

Okay, first of all you said you were only after your wallet, you got it back.

Second of all............ [he's struggling here, usually one of the other brothers chimes in to tell him to shut up. But fine, he'll put on the charisma face.] I know there's a group wanting to capture all these thief cats, and I am helping them round all the thieves up. So I'm just doing my part here.

And how do I know you're not lying? You literally just lied to me about seeing the cat! I've got no reason to trust you!

[They're going to be going around in circles at this rate.]

Besides, you've got a thief's mask and everything! I can't believe you'd sully the color blue with your actions!

Uh, excuse me.

[Okay wait no he's insulted now.]

First of all, this? [Points to the bandana.] Is a ninja bandana, my brothers and I all have one. And second [Points at him.] I lied because I need to turn this cat in to get money so I can buy something to eat for my brothers! They're my responsibility, so I have to do the hard work.

[Leo they are fully capable of getting their own food, you are going to buy pizza for yourself.]

[Darin points back dramatically!]

Aha! So, you admit it! Ninjas skulk about the shadows just like thieves! You're just especially well-armed thieves! And if your brothers are all bandana clad-ninja-thieves like yourself, then why do they need you to do this for them?!

[Honestly, Darin is far too worked up over this, otherwise he'd be able to empathize! And even respect the fact that Leo wants to take care of his brothers! But this has gotten so far out of hand, he's got to stay the course until something gives.]

...Wait...! You're gonna try and eat the cat aren't you?!

[...Look, some turtles are carnivorous!]

What? Ew, no.

And they need me to because they have absolutely no charisma, and I'm the leader.

[Yeah, Leo's not gonna be the one that gives. Not obviously anyway.]

There are some actual real restaurants here, why would you assume I'm going to eat the cat? Gross. Is that what you're wanting to do?

You call this charisma? Sorry, but no. See, if you were half as charismatic as you say, I wouldn't have busted your lie wide open like that.

Also, how the hell am I supposed to know what Turtle Demons eat? I wasn't aware you had such a refined pallet.

But fine, if all you want is food...tell you what. We split the bounty and I'll even chip in for the meal for you and your brothers. How's that?

[There are SO many things there. But he'll correct only one:] Okay, that's fine but let's get this straight, we're not demons or youkai or monsters, we're mutants.

But sure. Let's split it.

...Bet we could find more.

[Darin pats the air.]

Okay, okay. My bad. I shouldn't have assumed. I've just...never seen a walking, talking ninja turtle before. And considering where we are, well...

[He gestures to just...everything.]

But I'm not against trying to find more...I'm saving for something big so my cut would go to that...

Saving for something big, huh...

[He's nosy but he won't ask. Instead, he hoists the bag-o-fake-cat over his shoulder again.]

I think there are some more fake-cats that need our help being found, whaddaya say?

I say you have yourself a deal.

[Darin holds out a hand to shake.]

Name's Darin, by the way. Darin Altway, Master Blacksmith~ Pleasure to meet you.

[He'll take that hand, gripping at the forearm solidly.]

Leonardo. Leader and best brother of the Hamato family.

[Darin returns the grip with one of his own, grinning confidently.]

Alright, Leonardo, I have to ask. Was there something about the cat that made you realize it was one of the ones you were after? Aside from it having my wallet, I mean.

From what I've heard, they're not actually cats at all.

My amazingly skilled observation talent.

[Lucky guess.]

But no, they aren't really cats. Probably youkai, like most everyone else here.

What, that's it? Huh...this might be trickier than I thought...

But you said you had a lead?

There's some kinda seal that's hiding their second tail, you gotta look for it.

[That bag over his shoulder is squirming a little. Gettin' feisty in there.]

A seal, huh? And you were able to spot it?

[This is good. Darin rubs his chin in thought.]

Alright...if you've got a lead on where more of 'em are...then we just need bait.

[With a smirk, he holds up his wallet.]

Think you can shadow me from a good enough vantage point? I'll make some rounds, flashing some cash and when you spot one, we make the grab.

Sound like a plan?

From what I know, they've mostly been hanging out at cafes with a bunch of cats that look like them.

[But he does grin.]

'Can I shadow you', oh you naive simpleton. Don't even worry about it, I got you covered.

Edited 2022-09-01 07:36 (UTC)

I'll let that 'simpleton' remark slide for now.

So, I go to one of these cafés and let myself be bait. You keep an eye on me from the shadows and wait for one of these things to pinch my cash, and you nab it?

Hoho, you got it.

[And with that, as Darin turns around, he will find... nothing. Blue turtle man is gone.]

AUGUST 2022 TEST DRIVE

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