jigokufever | AUGUST 2022 TEST DRIVE

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AUGUST 2022 TEST DRIVE

1. SHUTEN TERRITORY - Muscling In

art by tohdraws

In the aftermath of the curse crisis, the Shuten Clan forgave a bunch of protection payments in the region, and helped cover the costs for rebuilding. Unfortunately, some of the street gangs in the area are much less civically minded. They have used the Shuten's relaxed policies as an opportunity to turn their own screws on the local business owners. These unaffiliated youth gangs have been much rougher with the locals, and have been asking for even larger collection fees. This has pissed off the folks who are just trying to get their lives and businesses back on track!

Unfortunately, the opening of Sai no Kawara in the underground drew so much of the clan's focus and manpower, that the issues up top just slipped through the cracks. Until now! Toraguma is in a bad mood and is looking for people to take it out on: the youth gangs will do just fine.

Volunteers are being solicited to join the regular Shuten enforcers in driving these interlopers out of Shuten territory. The gangs are wise to the usual Shuten tactics, though, and they're prepared for a fight. They are also appealing to the influx of Lost Souls: they act as though they're the victims of the factions' power struggles! They propose that taking up arms against the Shuten Clan will win them favor with the other groups in the city. (It will look less good with the Shuten Clan, should you be assigned to them.)

Fight with the Shutens, or with the gangs. Either way, a fight is coming.

2. TAMAMO TERRITORY - Throat Goat (NSFW)

at by akai riot

This prompt is overtly sexual in nature. Please use the proper NSFW labelling in your top levels and threads.

While the Palace of Sai in the underground is doing well, that doesn't mean the other businesses in the Tamamo Clan's collection have been slacking. One of the least "classy" soaplands has decided they're going to hold a contest to drive up business for themselves! They are partnering with some of the other sex clubs in the area for the sleaziest of events.

The Hyottoko Cup is looking for volunteer participants! The competition is pretty straightforward: a ruler is drawn on the throat of each participant and an array of members is presented to swallow. Whichever contestant can take the guests deepest and longest will take home the "coveted" Hyottoko Cup! Ok, there's a little judge favoritism involved too, so put on a show.

The guests have likewise been pulled in as volunteers, with instructions that they don't have to make this easy on the participants. Guests are provided with special seals that they can use for the length of the competition to enhance their natural assets. For those lacking the equipment entirely, there's a seal for that too.

Have fun and play nice.

3. TAMAMO TERRITORY - Strike a Poise (GEN)

Other businesses looking to jump start this month's earnings are also getting in on the spirit of competition! Businesses less oriented towards sexual service have come together as a means to draw in the high dollar clients, and one local club has proposed something old school.

Sign up for the Poise Contest, where contestants are placed into more and more ridiculous geta while tasked with serving drinks to the guest. Spills are expected, and the guests are cheerfully kitted out with cheap club-branded ponchos to protect their clothes. (Marketing, am I right?) While spills are expected, the contestant will lose points for each of the spilled drinks. Try to keep your balance as you attend to increasingly absurd drink orders. The intensity of the traditional footwear will only make your job that much harder.

Do you have what it takes to pour a champagne fountain while wearing teetering tengu geta? Prove your balance and dexterity is the best and the take home prize is some sweet cash. For Lost Souls freshly in the city, the chance to win some extra money can't really be passed up, huh…

4. SUTOKU TERRITORY - Jigokucho's Got Talent

Ever since Moonday's beloved singer – Ringo-chan – was kidnapped at the Tanabata festival, the band has had to cancel all of their scheduled gigs. Unfortunately, they were a hugely popular act, booked solid in most of the Sutoku Alliance's various nightclubs. This has left a ton of empty spots that need to be filled quickly, before the crowds get upset and demand… refunds.

That's where you come in, Lost Souls! Desperate promoters and talent bookers are literally grabbing Lost Souls off the street and begging, pleading, with them to perform a set for the night. They just need to have something to fill the space Moonday would have otherwise occupied. At least give the crowd something to see!

Acts do not need to be of the musical variety. Any performing talent is accepted, no matter how esoteric or bizarre! If it can fill out a 15-30 minute set, the club owners will be happy and the customers will at least see something interesting; even if it's a bad kind of interesting. So get on stage and show this city what you've got!

( Help us fill our time slots, please! We're desperate! 😩)

5. DEPARTMENT OF THE ENMA - Sticky Paws II: Outta the Bag

The Enma Department is busy: they have a kidnapping to investigate, a primordial god to pin down, and the crisis of their ever-shifting public image to manage. However, crime never sleeps and is always there to add to the troubled Department's workload. Worse still, we thought this little crime spree was over six months ago! But here it is again, much to the Enma's chagrin.

Cat cafés are a popular tourist attraction all across Jigokucho. About six months ago, a gang of bakeneko infiltrated several of the cafés to rob customers occupied with kitty bliss. Wallets, jewelry, and anything else those sticky paws could snatch away were being picked in droves. The cat capers are afoot once more!

Are you a hapless victim of these furry thieves, or are you helping the Department of the Enma track down these cat burglars? Unfortunately, the bakeneko are exceptionally clever and are using a seal to disguise their secondary tails. This makes them look just about like any normal cat. Better make sure your lead is good, or you'll be chasing down an ordinary Felis Catus. Soft to pet, but not going to return your pilfered cash.

Of course, the café staff might be in on this caper too… It's never easy to tell who's getting a cut of the profits. Be careful who you trust out there.

6. ALL OVER - The 100 Billion Yen Man (PLOT RELEVANT)

The local TV news has been announcing that Kaberou Kannazaki – the legendary finance wolf and the father of kidnapping victim, Ringo-chan – will be making an announcement this week. People have flocked to television sets throughout the city; at the squares, around TVs in bars, electronic stores, each other's phones, and any other venue with a connection. The kidnapping has been a highly public ordeal and the talk of the town. Many of the locals were present at the festival and witnessed the crime. They want to hear what the word is!

The public doesn't have to wait long. Wolf-eared Kaberou sits at a press desk, surrounded by microphones, and dazzled with flashbulbs. He clears his throat and, as he begins to speak, he is direct and to the point; not unlike a wolf lunging for the throat.

"As of today, I am issuing a bounty on the man known as the Iron Bear, who has claimed responsibility for the kidnapping of my daughter, Ringo Kannazaki. The payout to the party responsible for bringing me Iron Bear, dead or alive, is 100 Billion Yen. Individuals or groups, I don't care. Just bring my daughter back to me, and the money is yours."

Well! The Department of the Enma's hopes of an orderly investigation have been dashed, but this is certainly an opportunity for anyone brave enough – or, more accurately, stupid enough – to traverse the Wasteland. Maybe one of you out there will find the legendary Iron Bear and bring him to some form of justice.

Local businesses are quick to leap at this opportunity, too. They begin to aggressively push sponsorships at would-be bounty hunters. Weapons? Armor? Survival gear? All at discount prices! Each faction has their interest in collecting the massive bounty as well. They will all be putting a lot of pressure on recruits to get ready to head out to the Wastes.

If you just got here? Well, it would definitely be in your interest to start finding gear, and finding people willing to collect that bounty with you. It could mean a big step forward toward your eventual contract, after all.

Welcome to the test drive meme!

First of all, big thanks to our discord chat for the "Throat Goat" prompt idea. Stay golden, gang.
IF YOU'RE TOP-LEVELING A NEW CHARACTER, post it here!
Characters already in the game can top level as well.
Threads here can be considered game canon.
Characters can be recruited to do work for any faction until they're given their official assignment.
If you have any questions about the TDM content, please ask them here! You can find information on the story so far here!
If you have questions about the game itself, please check out the premise, FAQ, and rules pages.
Reserves are open until September 5th.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

1. Shuten Territory

[Now, he's brand new to all of this, and he's not entirely sure what's going on, but he gets the idea. There's conflict, and it needs to be resolved. That's what he's good at, he does it all the time. He'd been warned there might be a fight, but Thoma is determined to try to solve it without throwing hands.

Seems that now, he's in a tough spot with whoever is with him right now, talking to some of the gang members.]

Now, now, [he starts, as one gang member continuously hits a pipe against the palm of his hand with impatience at Thoma.]

I'm not here to start a fight, I just wanted to talk, that's all. I don't see why we can't have an amiable discussion about things, even if we end up having to go our separate ways.

2. Throat Goat (NSFW)

[This was not what he was expecting when he heard the words 'Hyottoko Cup'. He'd just assumed, because the Hyottoko character from Inazuma breathed fire through a bamboo pipe, that this was a fire breathing contest of some sort. Something he thought he'd have an advantage at, given the fact that he was a pyro vision wielder and all. So he volunteered, it would be fun, right?

He was so wrong. He misunderstood everything.

He doesn't know why they are drawing on his neck, and when he looks at the other participants, he notices they're marks for measuring something...

He's already getting a bad feeling about this. When he asks as he regards the markings,] Hey...what exactly is that supposed to be?

[The person drawing it on him only responds with a don't you know the rules of the competition? Thoma only shakes his head no, apparently he doesn't- and they only say Just relax, and open your throat. It'll go down smooth if you do.

Which isn't helpful.

He's pushed on stage, and it's now that he awaits his fate and finds out what's really happening here...]

5. Sticky Paws

[Oh no, they're all cute, he wants to pet them all and make little sweaters for them.

It's almost as if the little thieves know that Thoma has a huge soft spot for animals, picking them up and playing with them to his heart's content. Little does he know that he's about to lose every cent of money he has, which isn't much as it is since he's just arrived, but it doesn't matter now. He's got all these cats around and he's just a happy guy.]

Aren't you the cutest? Awww, look at your little paws-!

[Thoma happily pets the paw of one of the friendly thieves, but not for too long! He knows the boundaries here.]

Wildcard

[I'm up for any of the other prompts too, I just didn't write a starter for them! Feel free to hit me with anything, I'll happily roll with it. You can find me over at

bucketsofbeans!

[ If there were anything that Yae knew Thoma was all about, it'd be his undying loyalty and dedication to his job, so it probably wouldn't come out as a surprise when Yae noticed a very familiar sight of the blonde mending some of the fights and (un)surprisingly successfully at it. Yae, however, didn't show herself up and decided to keep a considerable distance and hide behind any possible walls whenever he was mediating so that she wouldn't disturb Thoma while he was on the job. Professionality was one thing that Yae always held high, after all.

Just after he was off the clock and alone, on the other hand, it was a different thing altogether. So when Thoma was trying to go back into his apartment or wherever he had in mind just after the shit went down peacefully, he'd hear some familiar footstep and womanly giggles approaching from behind. They were slow, barely audible, but gradually getting louder and... More menacing.

Perhaps accompanied by some good old fashioned, you know, boss fight music. ]

Good job out there, young man.

[ You escaped Yae Miko of Inazuma. Now, welcome to the second stage of hell, Thoma, where you're about to encounter Yae Miko of Hell. ]

[It had been a stressful day. Trying to get some of the gang members to even consider leaving peacefully was difficult, and he's grateful that a lot of it was solved with words instead of fists. But he was ready to relax, heading back home to make some tea of some sort. But he hasn't gotten far, before he hears something familiar, something...terrifying.

He turns his head, ears perked up, slowly turning.

Thoma's eyebrows raise at the sight of no one other than Yae Miko, and now he realizes why this place is called hell.]

L-Lady Guuji! What a nice surprise! Thank you, I was just trying to help!

[Who??? Let???? Her in here?????]

[ Ah, yes. That reaction. Very nostalgic. That immediately makes her want to bully him to oblivion-

-Well, he's probably a bit tired right now, so just for the token of good will, Yae just snickers back at Thoma's stutters. Doesn't mean that she won't stop getting closer to him, however. Yae playfully strides over at his side, unaware of his space and privacy— Oh who am I kidding, she's aware of it but she doesn't give any fuck about it. ]

You made it look like you're seeing a ghost, Thoma. Or do you consider me a ghost of your past already? Oh, I am so hurt...

[ This is what he has to deal on daily basis now. This is your life now, Thoma. ]

[Oh no, here it comes. This isn't so bad, not yet, but Thoma returns an apologetic look to Yae. He hopes his face doesn't actually look like that, it's only going to add fuel to her fire and that's the last thing he wants.]

No, no, it's not like that at all. I was just surprised to see you here. There seems to be so many people pulled in here from all over, I just hadn't expected so many to be here from Inazuma.

[Thoma is hoping she'll buy that excuse, and not because she scares the crap out of him. Maybe it's time to try to change the subject before she really gets him...]

If you're in this area, does that mean you've been working with the Shuten Clan to help the locals out?

[Somehow, he feels like...that's not the case.]

Thoma | Genshin Impact

1+Wildcard-ish...? I'm so sorry for this Thoma except I'm not

bwahaha never be sorry

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5-ish

i'll call you out on every edit you make for the rest of your life now

pls 3 comes after 2, not 5!!!

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5

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would you like to do a fight thread or have them just run for it, i'm good for both honestly

im just winging it, but maybe we can do a bit of both?? they try to fight and then book it?

LOL that sounds like a perfect recipe for disaster let's do it

100 Billion Yen Man

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shenhe you're his hero